This is how I did it.

I really want to be intentional about building the consistency in shaping the theatre of my experience into something you can take home - not that my experience is special or anything, I just want bring something honest to the table of human existence.

That's what I go for; each addition to this space should be more honest than the last.

Today, I want to present something for the ones who've hurt, and those who've been hurt.

I know what it's like to have intent as pure as a clear blue sky, and still have your heart broken. I know what it's like to create a new element in the heart of someone you love, and feel the affection toward you shrivel and die. I know what it's like to evolve faster than you can even process the change, and be stopped in your tracks by the past self you left in someone's mind.

I know what it's like to see the trust in someone's eyes fracture and break, both in one moment and throughout time. I know what it's like to make a promise to yourself in the past, and make mindless decisions that break your promise in the future. I know what it's like to have the paint your dreams over the world, and have them drenched in the black of random misfortune.

People can hurt me.

I can hurt people.

My awakening was a lot like being pushed off a cliff and passing out from the sheer panic of falling and when I came to, I was still falling.

Instead of just falling, though, I started diving. It's unclear, but I feel this urge that I building momentum for... something. 

There's a mystery behind the kinetic energy of a kind spirit, and the toughest part for me is extending that kindness to myself - this is how I did it:

1. I learned to let go - the go-to comfort people will offer you in the midst of your heart ache is ''move on''. If you think about it, moving on is something we do all the time; you moved on from whatever you were doing a moment ago to read this, and you will proceed to move on from reading this to do something else. Letting go is less about removing yourself from something, and more about removing something from yourself.
2. I learned to trust people - the toughie. I'll tell this as simply as I can: when you love someone, you let them make their own choices. If someone wants to be away from you, trust that they're making a decision that's best for them and love them enough to let them. You'll have to round off that ride by making a decision that's best for you, though.
3. I learned about myself - it's remarkably easy to lapse into madness while your world is falling apart. In all that noise, you need to find your ground again. I spent some time away, in my mind to see what I'm really made of. When you think about the best version of yourself, what comes to mind? What does it look like when you've unmasked yourself for the genius you really are? What do people speak over you when they look past the damage that's holding you down? It's your responsibility to unearth that potential, unless you're alright with being just another spiritually wealthy grave.

I forgot to mention earlier that I started to fall because the ground separated beneath my feet - the things I knew vanished before I could even recognise it. But I started to see my fall as my dive, and when I land I'll break new ground.

God bless and take charge, reader. Thank you for staying long enough for me to thank you.

Stay cool,

- Your Friendly Neighbourhood Kenji